Last Straw

Click here to download!

Like a flower fades in winter freeze
Or a river empties into spring
Like an atom splits itself in two
Oh my anthem, sings its simple tune

Like a spirit spins a clear head round
Or a swing set drops back to the ground
Like an outlaw falling on his knees
Oh my last straw, finally killing me

Mile Marker 331

Asleep I had a dream I saw
The northern lights, the northern lights
In the early morning of
A winter night, a winter night

There was a long drive to get here
I am sure, my love
I am sure, my love
It was a long night to live through
But we've made it now
Oh we've made it now

You saw a crystal ball up there
And held a knife, and held a knife
You wanted to see galaxies
It's where they hide, it's where they hide

There was a long drive to get here
I am sure, my love
I am sure, my love
It was a long night to live through
But we've made it now
Oh we've made it now

So sick of feeling like a,
So sick of feeling like a ghost
So sick of feeling like a,
So sick of feeling like a ghost

In The Ground

This is a song I recorded with my friend Jennifer Fuentes. We call ourselves "Irresistible Nothings". Enjoy. (Click on the link below to listen and download)

Download Irresistible Nothings - In The Ground

Take me up in your glassy airplane
I just want to see the world
Maybe up so high
I won't even say goodbye
To everyone I know

And I, just want to leave it all
And I, just want to feel the fall
And I, just want to leave it all
In the ground

Can you take me where
stars shine brighter
than any grassy field?
They're so beautiful,
Unattainable,
So wonderful, surreal

And I, just want to leave it all
And I, just want to feel the fall
And I, just want to leave it all
In the ground

Have you found a place,
Oh a resting place,
Where I can lay down?

On Insurgence

Stifling, with dreams like
paper truths cremated
in the basement of the

Ministry, with intent
to burn all life and all
ambition out of me

Eternally, while my
sluggish heart hardly cares;
and all creation sits

Soundlessly, with faces
melting into blue-grey
oceans of digital

Urgency, with muteness
stemming from delusion
that our words are billed by

Quantity, and I?

I just want to float down frosty rivers,
navigating rapids and

To swim in sunny surf,
pursued by Poseidon and outsmarting the sirens and

To cross this continent by train,
rambling with Kerouac and all the tumbling miles of track
and singing with the click-clack and
To simply BE
breathing in the mountain air
or hiking all these cobbled stairs
or laughing with a brilliant old friend

At a table
in a bar
on a riverbank
with a drink
and a warm smile.

Enough For Two

I tried to talk with you again
I'm sorry I guess I'm not ready for the end
Cause there was this fatal feeling
Like Charlemagne's army was finally closing in

And I knew all that I wanted
Was a room, enough for two
And I knew all that I wanted
Was a place for me and you

I tried to be a charming man
I'm sorry I guess it was foolish to just pretend
Cause there was this naked feeling
Like all of my mysteries were solved before I began

And I knew all that I wanted
Was a room, enough for two
And I knew all that I wanted
Was a place for me and you

I saw a brick house it was covered in vines
I said to myself one day all this will be mine
Then soldiers shoved in and they tore it apart
Now all that is left is our rubble and sparks

And I knew all that I wanted
Was a room, enough for two
But I guess all that I wanted
Will just have to stay subdued

Soft Blows

Here:
Standing on the south pole
braving the 31 below zero
Like paramagnetic slivers
faced with parka-less shivers
after their brief trembling

Iron red, Eyes run redder

You albatross, spanning your global wings
because a thousand miles wasn't enough distance
You albatross, devouring golden calves
guided by the currents and incandescent lamps
You albatross, swooping down the sea-line
baring your teeth at the black and white
You albatross, plaguing the water and wine
because even a blurry view is much too bright

Here:
Standing on the center-sun
sweating anthemic buckets
Like emasculated cloudbursts
losing our shoes and shirts
after a sudden final flare

May

Download MP3 Here

I got scared in the winter
That the summer had disappeared
And we all got trapped in our isolation
Let's get out of here, yeah!

I rode around on my bicycle
Thinking of all the words you said
It was so good, it was so good
It was so good like the month of May
It was so good, it was so good
It was so good like the month of May
When everything looks close on maps
And everyone just smiles in the photographs

I caught you trying to catch a break
Your pulse was slowing, it was frozen in a way
It's ok to finish, even if you're late
It's ok to finish, you know that I can wait

I got scared watching snow fall
That the spring would never come
And we'd all be trapped here in hibernation
Waiting for the sun, yeah!

It was so good, it was so good
It was so good like the month of May
It was so good, it was so good
It was so good like the month of May
When everything looks close on maps
And everyone just smiles in the photographs

City

6:09 pm with a thunderous crash
I finally got the chance to leave you waiting

I sat around the house
and built a fire with a match;
I changed my clothes
(suit and tie)
Stepped into the elevator

Froze my ears off
figure-skating sidewalks
I hailed a car:
50th
49th
48th
...a countdown to disaster, see?

Looked up your name
and called your bluff,
You were seven stories up
In a window shining bright
Like a hurricane devouring lamp posts
Look out
(and hear me) bellow!

and at the table
in the store
in the demonstration room
in this exhibition
i heard it begin
s o s o f t l y
but building...

Until all our fine china had been dissolved
Until all our clothes were splatter-painted
Orange and Red
Orange and REd
Orange and RED
We walked outside into our crumbling city
and watched the fire go out

Saints (with MP3 download link)

Download MP3 here
The wind blows
across my back;
I am wandering,
I am whispering
to you now
'til you know

Distant waves
Different saints
We are saved by the sound

The wind blows
across my back;
I am wandering,
I am whispering
to you now
'til you know:
"I love you"

The Warmest Feeling

Holding hands was the warmest feeling;
could use it right now
Snow is falling, the earth is calling
all its friends back down

It's so beautiful, The most beautiful thing
I've seen in awhile
I know it's pitiful, Yeah so pitiful but
I can't seem to smile

Oh, I wish I was sharing this with you
Oh, I wish I was sharing this with you
Oh, how I wish I was sharing this with you
Oh, I wish to God I was...

Take a picture to help you remember
Everything you saw
I'll be watching, through the winter
Waiting for the thaw

Enjoy the weather, Enjoy your feathers
Keep using them to fly
It's for the better, It's so much better
If you don't realize

Oh, I wish I was sharing this with you
Oh, I wish I was sharing this with you
Oh, how I wish I was sharing this with you
Oh, I wish to God I was...

Get up, get up, move faster now
Come watch it all fall down
I don't think I have ever seen
More beauty than right now
Get up, get up, and move your feet
It's freezing back at home
Come on, you know that we are both
Shivering
Shivering
Shivering, alone...

On That Day

These lyrics come with a bonus: a video of me playing the song! Email me (pknettel@gmail.com) for a copy of the MP3.



I want to wake up with my eyes wide open
I want to see everything, in awe of it all
I want to break, break open all the windows
And let the rain pour in

I'm gonna leave here, on the next train coming
I want to be there, when the sun goes down
I'm gonna wake up in a different hour
It's enough to make me smile

Oh, I'm off to see the world
I'll travel so fast, so far
Oh you know, I'd stop
Or at least I'd slow it down
To be where you are

I want to wake up with a mouthful of laughter
I want to sing with the birds and the wind
I want to throw off all of these covers
And let the sun stream in

I'm gonna buy you two dozen roses
I want to see them fall to the ground
I'm gonna watch you with your eyes wide open
Screaming I love, I love, I love, I love you

Oh, I'm off to see the world
I'll travel so fast, so far
Oh you know, I'd stop
Or at least I'd slow it down
To be where you are

I'm gonna walk out into the ocean
I want to feel my fears float away
I'm gonna swim with you in the sunlight
On that glorious day
On that glorious day
On that day

Cavalry

We lost, we lost this one
To the bright and shining sun
We stared, it was so beautiful
But it only left us burned

We tried, to stop it
We tried, to slow it down
We watched, we watched it fall
So quickly towards the ground

I have no words
To share with you my friend
I lost my nerve
I think it's time you just forget
I was here

You stole, you stole the very thing
I could not afford to lose
I called, I called the cavalry in
They were of no use

You ran, to stop it
You ran, to slow it down
(It was the only thing you could do)
I watched, I watched and tried to chase
But could not follow through


I have no words
To share with you my friend
I lost my nerve
I think it's time you just forget
I was here

Rush in on your white horse and try to rescue me
I swear you're six months late and I've fallen helplessly
Don't cry or make a scene, I'll plunge into the ground
I swear if you lose any sleep over me now...
There's no use trying to stop me
There's no use trying to help me
There's no use trying to save me

(Bunker Hill)

We all see the same things
Why don't we see all things the same?

In that cavern behind our eyes
Light is trapped,
wrapped around corners, stopped

dead

in its tracks
on bones
piles and piles of bones
thousands upon thousands of bones!

Oh, these grievances
these hindrances
these wincing witnesses,
skeletons:

muskets in hand
lurking invisibly
or, at least, inconspicuously
until they see the whites of my eyes...

Good Gets Better

Wake up every morning
on the wrong side of the bed
Seems to make no difference
which way you lay your head

Arise to the pain
you let it sink in
Arise to your name
they're calling again

They say good gets better
Well does bad get worse?
Cause I've had my share of failure
All worn out from this curse

Sitting down at your table
in your mug swirls the steam
And your throat isn't able
to stop the burning

You're sore from the breathing
your lungs can attest
You're sore from the screaming
in agony protest

They say good gets better
Well does bad get worse?
Cause I've had my share of failure
All worn out from this curse
All worn out from this curse

Don't go and say I know what I do
cause I don't believe that this is the truth
Everyday something old's gonna break
and everyday something new's being made
It's the way everything's gonna end,
everything will begin

They say good gets better
Well does bad get worse?
Cause I've had my share of rejections and failure
All worn out from this curse
All worn out from this curse
I'm worn out from this curse

It's Getting Better

Look back over your shoulder
Standing there at the counter
Stealing glances, oh it's so easy
Taking chances: please believe me

I don't know the answers
I don't have a clue

Keep a straight face when it hurts to smile
Sitting down now just for awhile
Take a breather now and again
We'll take refuge, then what will happen?

I don't know the answers
I don't have a clue
I just know it's better
I just know it's you
Like all my friends do

I just know that I love your shoulders
I just know that I love your smile
I just know that it's getting better
Like all my friends do

Goodbye Paradigm

I used to think everything was possible
but this is like trying to hold the melting snow
or stop the waves from crashing,
the kids from catching
each others' colds.

I used to know how everything ought to be
but this is like the changing winter trees
or the graying skies,
the loss of light
above our heads.

I guess that this was the wrong time
When I awoke with a pain in my side
I recall I was dreaming (something sweet)
I should have kept closed my eyes

I used to talk like everything was going fine,
so this is my confession, it's been sealed and signed:
it's all those words I never spoke,
all those tears that I just choked
back again;
it's everything I could have broke
if I had the chance to fall
in love again.

The Constancy of Marble

*The ---- don't mean anything, they are just the only way I could get blogger to let me do indents*

I resolve, from this moment on
To wake up at seven each morning
--(and not hit the snooze several times)
To waste fewer moments on the worthless things
--like television and online quizzes;
--worrying and self-deprecating what-ifs
To be full and then stop
To be satisfied and then balk
--at the “I want, I need, I must!”
--shrieking in my ears
To listen to you
--and remember your words
--and not be thinking about
----the strangeness of the word marmalade
----and the even stranger-ness of the way it's made
----or why in God's great assembly line
----there aren't options like automobiles on which we decide:
----“Temperature-controlled”
----“Adamantium-plated”
----“Wings-equipped”
----“Four-hands, extended leg”
----...and yes, it's got a Hemi!
To laugh more
To get frustrated less
To love more
To take pride in your success
--even when it implies my failure
To grasp onto, every day, something
--So that when I look back in 48 hours
--in 48 days
--in 48 years
--I will not see a few illuminated peaks in an otherwise
--Dull, dark and grey landscape
--but instead a forest basking in the colors of a late fall afternoon
--a mountain range revealed as the morning mist subsides
--an ocean at sunset in the warm and pleasant summer
--and a satisfaction
--a deep and lasting comfort
--when at long last confronting
--this dreaded listless panic
To sing joyfully
--and mournfully
To sit peacefully
--and restlessly
To see everything
--and just one thing more
To give you, all you who listen
--Just a little bit of hope
--In an impossible world

Thieves

I saw the stars burning outside
Tell me, is there a guiding light?
If so, it don't burn bright

Lately I have wandered about
Is the truth nowhere to be found,
Or is it just hiding out?

Oh, as robbers go
I haven't managed to steal much
Oh, as cowards go
I cannot seem to give this up

I heard the knocking at my door
You were ready for something more
But what's the point in keeping score?

I was wrestling with my fears
But your hands they drew me near
Now I just feel trapped here

Oh, as robbers go
I haven't managed to steal much
Oh, as cowards go
I cannot seem to give this up

Turn your cold shoulder this way
I know you know what to say
It's so easy to break my heart, it's great
No really it is ok
From the start of this day
I knew the end of this page was always missing

Oh, as robbers go
I haven't managed to steal much
Oh, as cowards go
I cannot seem to give this up
Oh, you thieves, you know
I haven't managed to steal much
Oh, as we all know
There's never been a chance for us

Not A Typical Post, But...

Read this sentence several times:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT
OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY
COMBINED WITH THE
EXPERIENCE OF YEARS.

Make sure you have read it several times before continuing.

Now count the number of F's in that sentence. Count them ONLY ONCE.
Do not go back and count them again. Then see below:
~
~
~
~
~
~
~
~
~
~
~
~
~
~
~
There are six F's in the sentence. The majority of people only count three of them. Most people forget the Fs in the word OF. The human brain tends to see them as Vs instead of F's because of how they sound.

This test was in one of my textbooks. I only counted 3 and I thought it was insane and interesting so I thought I'd share the experience with you!

Pinned (Or Something About Change)

I wish I lived somewhere
With the looming glory of mountains
Or the soothing sound of oceans
Or the dazzling white of snow
Or the endless rows of one-hundred-stories
Or the stones of ancient settlements
Or the rushing roar of rivers
Or the night streets
(filled with people
walking, and laughing
and living...
Oh to truly live!
To not be sucked into the day to day
Mediocrity
by obligation
or comfort, or perhaps just the blindness: inexperience
of something better
something inspiring
something beautiful and passionate and real)
Or the quiet of a little cabin
Or the cold chill of the night air
Or the warmth of a little flame
Or the light of fiery orange
Or the sinking-into-your-chair softness of a good book
Or the corner of the eye vision of you
Or the happiness of love